Most of these posts are fairly well planned out, but lately it’s just been thrown out there. I totally (accidentally!) abandoned my posting schedule because of the crazy amount of life that’s been going on. I don’t even know how many people still read this anymore. I haven’t checked. I’m just going to write, even if it’s the same post I’ve written a million times.
Right now, I’m an idiot. I’m very short-sighted. I’ve fallen into the all-too-common trap of seeing everything through the lens of how things will affect me. I know it’s part of humanity to naturally do everything out of self-preservation but that isn’t what I want to be defined by. I definitely have moments where I do everything for other people and forget what it’ll mean for me after I do it but I’d like to find some in between.
I mostly subscribe to ThoughtCatalog because I think the whiny late 20-somethings are hilarious in their ultra-serious musings that are supposed to warn me. On a few occasions, though, someone will write something too personal for the internet. I love those. The one that got me to write today is a post about knowing who your person is.
In summation, your person is one step above your good friend. They know too much about you, you have inside jokes with them, your personal bubble with them is heavily reduced, time is much less of a factor, and you have unspoken understandings.
Lord (and internet) knows I’ve been after this person. Even more than I’ve been after a significant other, I’ve just been trying to find my person. I’m blessed enough to have found some great close friends. I have friends with whom I have songs. Friends I have traditions with. Really, if you put those people together I would have my person. A one-stop shop who I am completely safe with. I’m tired of protecting myself with every single syllable. At the same time, I love my people. More than they love me.
I just don’t want to wake up one day and realized that I loved them too much for what I am to them. I’d like to be in the same place as someone else, for once. That’ll be my person.