So, I’m an odd party-goer. I don’t know a lot of other people who go with such conscious objectives. Everyone has an objective, of course (lookin’ at you, Stan!), but not everyone goes with it expressly on their mind.
My objectives are usually fairly similar, so I will now use Tamar Braxton to illustrate my typical Saturday night.
Walking in after the party’s already been going for a while:
Upon closer inspection:
But during all of these feelings, I’m trying to limit my face to this:
I’ll start talking to people, who are drunk enough to have amazingly insights as to what they want to happen. They didn’t have these insights when they came to the party, but there’s been enough alchy to make it very clear to them.
At this point, to make themselves feel normal, there is usually an attempt to coerce me into doing something comparably scandalous.
“But Armelle!” they say,
To which I say,
I usually get one of these back:
And then I’m off to my regularly scheduled programming. Here’s what happens for the rest of the party, sometimes in my head and sometimes very much outside of it:
Eventually, I will get what I came for, which is usually information.
And then I get to be an idiot for like half an hour before we leave.
If you ask me the next day, that last part didn’t happen.
Then it’s time for the discussion/feelings part of the night, for which there are no Tamar GIFs.
Next one’s in 5 hours, guys. Get ready to make some memories for me.